marina abramovic

this past friday night, my two friends kat and danlly, got in line at 9:20 pm and 11 something ish almost midnight respectively outside MoMA to wait and see Marina Abramovic. it was kat's second time, danlly's first. i had debated about joining them but other plans and a house party i was photographing in bushwick detained me.
saturday i went to bbq in staten island, i got there at around 1 pm. at around 7, people started to peter out and my mind started wandering, i began thinking about the exhibit, it was almost over, it ends monday or tomorrow. should i go? should i go? i texted a friend, she said do it. i should, i should, i should.
misha, i said to my friend, walk me to the bus, i'm going to MoMA.
an express bus that wasn't much express, charged my phone, grabbed a red bull, took a cab there and arrived at 10 pm, i was 3rd in line.
it was good vibes, my friend sterling came at 10:30 to sit with me and kept me company until 1 am.
i made some great line buddies- aman, melanie, dena and chanda. they had all been there before, but melanie and dena hadn't sat with marina yet.
everyone started talking about good vibes and energy, the people i sat with (most of them) practiced yoga and meditation. they all had the most calming effect.
marina's projects tend to bring out good vibes, bad vibes and darwinism in people, i htink that's what drew me to it. its about the human condition, the experience and the endurance.
people passed out numbers, we maintained order.
at 11 something i went to get coffee and food for myself and others and when i returned, a german woman #7, was sitting in my vacated spot. i felt violated and my line buddies were not happy with her sitting there. cutting is incredibly frowned upon. we formed our own rules, thus people cannot violate the group rules. i wanted to growl, i felt violated, that was my spot! i felt possesive but didn't want to start a fight. i sat down across form her and implied i wanted my spot back. she eventually moved and when she did, melanie and dena scurried over whispering reclaim your spot! and thus i did.
i noted in my notebook at 11:30 am, the there are mosquitoes and i m still awake.
1:30 am, lots of laughter in line (from my group).
5 am, i can't sleep, the concrete is unforgiving, and it's cold.

the waiting and endurance of waiting is just as much as a performance as sitting with abramovic
we got inside and waited some more, there was so much excitement.
once inside, we sat down, there were performers and vips in front of us, only six though. i bumped back to nine. an australia lady kept trying to weasel end behind us. she acted like b/c we formed the line, we were in charge and no matter how we tried to convince her, that we had formed a pact as the whole group of line waiting, that we weren't in charge, we were all in charge, the # system is a way to maintain order in the anarchy, peaceful anarchy, a community and we all agreed to it. at some point, two people behind us came up and said they would get the guards if she didn't leave, she could leave with dignity but it wasn't fair for everybody leave.
she was kind of harshing on our vibes (haha), but she left. we meditated and laughed.

marina is a tibetan buddhist and that makes sense that i felt a level of ascetiscm within her work. i also felt there is a level of zen or energy that were similar in monasteries (i wrote this before entering the space) and that was true in teh space but to a much smaller degree.

i was nervous to sit with marina. the 15 minutes went by so incredibly quickly. i got an incredibly maternal vibe from her. we had a mind conversation, i told her it was uncomfortable sitting there and she said i know, it's okay. she told me that everything is going to be okay. my mind jumped alot. then it was over. i felt like she was a mom, maybe of a 15 yr old son. i don't know if that's true.
it was like having a mimimalist conversation with my friend's (any friend's) mom.
dena and melanie cried afterwards, i feel like their sitting was more meditation and yoga centric, they said they felt a lot of peace.

it was worth it, i would it again. i debated about doing it again tonight.

i went through the rest of the exhibition of her work and saw henri cartier bresson's work. i was so tired.
she has a beautiful force, it was intense but for different reasons. to sit and stare and try to non verbal communicate and connect with someone that you don't know but you definitely have knowledge of them, you bring so many different things to the table. it was just an interesting way to see someone. staring at her, i felt my vision focus on her entire face, and then just her eyes, putting her face out of focus. she was here, real, in front of me. she was real.
she is real.

in order
(wearing rachel comey dress and shoes)